If At First You Don’t Succeed . . .
Try again – but not forever – just three times, total, to really be able to be assertive. What do I mean by that?
Assertiveness is a developing skill that flies in the face of your resistive ego that only wants to keep running the same avoidant, victim-justifying inner tape inside you to be able to keep you from breaking loose and becoming your own freer, greater, empowered self.
What Are the Three Essential Steps to Becoming Assertive
1. Do something that will make you trust yourself.
2. Choose a response in a situation that you find challenging that will cause you to feel proud of yourself.
3. Ask yourself what is the most courageous choice I can make here – and do it.
Three Things That “Gum Up The Works”
1. Anything that moves you to avoid and justify.
2. Choosing from a sense of what you are afraid might happen rather than choosing from a sense of what in your heart of hearts feels like the right thing to do, or what you feel is best meant to happen in a challenging situation.
3. Looking to please someone else – or get them to shut up.
So What Are the Three Successive Choices You Can Make to Develop Your Assertiveness?
1. Be true to yourself.
2. Be courageous.
3. Release any agenda, expectation, desired or fear-based outcome – by that I mean, predetermined sense that “I must have this or I’ll die”, even if there is an implication, or flavor of that, without it being fully stated or something you’re even clearly aware of.
Here Are the Three Progressive Steps for You to Try to Become More Assertive
1. Say briefly and simply how you feel.
2. Say briefly and simply what you want.
3. Say briefly and simply what you need.
STOP THERE.
LET GO.
SEE WHAT HAPPENS.
READY . . . SET . . . GO . . .
And please, keep me posted. Happy experimenting – and remember, you’ve truly got nothing to lose – and a whole lot to gain – your greater, more empowered self!